Cheat Codes: Say No

Brian Fink
2 min readJan 13, 2023

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Photo by Justin Arkinson on Unsplash

There’s a lot of power in saying “no.”

An authentic “hell yes” relies on the occasional “no, thanks.”

There are those of us who struggle with boundaries. We are people pleasers. Hell, I say “yes” to a lot of conversations I should knowingly say “no” to, but for some reason, I find it uber challenging to do so.

For people like me, it can feel like we aren’t allowed to say “no” or don’t deserve to do so. It can feel like we need to be armed with bulletproof excuses. We might feel obligated to cater to other people’s feelings at our own expense.

I only recognized my misery once I was deeply entrenched. I said “yes” to extra work tasks I didn’t need to, “yes” to social events that drained me, and “yes” to coffees that weren’t right for me.

Does that sound like you?

Re-framing this mindset about boundaries is life-changing. On the downside, you’ll learn that you might’ve been hurting yourself and others by lacking boundaries.

On the upside, once you start practicing these phrases, you’ll discover that saying “no” to one thing is saying “yes” to something else, whether that is “yes” to more free time, “yes” to healthy solitude, yes to an activity you want to do, or simply “yes” to exercising your autonomy.

Today, try saying “no” to just one thing you know will be an energy vampire.

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Brian Fink
Brian Fink

Written by Brian Fink

Executive Recruiter. ✈ #ATL ↔ #SF ✈ Building companies is my favorite. Opinions are my own. Responsibility is freedom. 🖖

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