Respect Your Time, or No One Else Will

Brian Fink
5 min readJan 12, 2025

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Photo by Murray Campbell on Unsplash

Here’s the uncomfortable truth: people mirror how you treat your own time. If you’re constantly late, they’ll assume your time is flexible. If you say “yes” to every request, they’ll keep piling them on. If you let meetings run over, they’ll conclude that your time isn’t all that precious. The result? You’re stuck in a never-ending game of Tetris, juggling other people’s priorities while your own goals gather dust in the corner.

I’ve been there. Early in my career, I thought the key to success was saying “yes” to everything. New projects? Yes. After-hours calls? Yes. Volunteering to organize the office holiday party? Sure, why not. What I didn’t realize was that every “yes” to someone else was a “no” to myself. Slowly, my calendar stopped belonging to me. I wasn’t just overbooked — I was overwhelmed.

The irony? I thought being agreeable and available would make me indispensable. Instead, I became a doormat with a LinkedIn profile.

The solution is simple, but not easy: you must set the standard. The way you manage your time is the way others will perceive it. Respect your time, and others will follow suit. Here’s how.

1. Start by Saying “No” More Often

Saying “no” is not a rejection; it’s a strategy. Every time you say “yes” to something, you’re implicitly saying “no” to something else — often something more important. A project that actually moves the needle. Time with your family. An hour to just think and reset.

When someone makes a request, don’t default to “yes” out of guilt or obligation. Instead, pause and ask yourself:

  • Does this align with my goals?
  • Will saying “yes” add value, or just clutter?
  • Am I the best person for this task, or can it be delegated?

If the answer to these questions leans toward “no,” then say it — and mean it. Be direct but polite. Something like, “I’d love to help, but my plate is full right now” signals respect for both your time and theirs.

2. Guard Your Calendar Like It’s Your Wallet

Think of your calendar as a reflection of your priorities. Every block of time is an investment, so treat it as such. If you wouldn’t hand $100 bills to anyone who asks, why hand them your time?

Here’s a trick: schedule time for your priorities before someone else gets to them. I call this “pre-claiming your calendar.” Whether it’s deep work, strategic thinking, or even a midday workout, block it off. Otherwise, the empty space becomes a magnet for other people’s agendas.

Once it’s scheduled, treat it as sacred. No rescheduling unless it’s truly critical. If someone tries to book over it, don’t be afraid to say, “I already have a commitment at that time. Can we look at alternatives?”

3. Master the Art of Short Meetings

Meetings are like goldfish: they expand to fill the container you put them in. Give a meeting an hour, and it’ll take an hour — whether or not you need it.

Here’s how to take back control:

  • Set a clear agenda: No agenda, no meeting. Period.
  • Shrink the invite list: Only include people who are essential to the conversation. Everyone else can get the summary.
  • Timebox like a boss: Cap meetings at 30 minutes whenever possible. You’d be amazed how much faster decisions happen when time is tight.
  • End early: If you finish the discussion in 20 minutes, don’t drag it out for the sake of “using the time.” Wrap it up and give everyone 10 minutes back.

Respecting time in meetings doesn’t just make you more productive — it sets a tone. Others will start showing up prepared and respecting the clock, too.

4. Stop Rewarding Bad Behavior

Every time you let someone’s lateness, interruptions, or overstepping slide, you’re silently saying, “This is fine.” It’s not.

Imagine this scenario: A colleague habitually arrives 15 minutes late to your one-on-ones. They stroll in with a coffee, apologizing as they sit down. What message does it send if you extend the meeting to accommodate them? That your time is flexible.

Instead, enforce boundaries. If the meeting is scheduled from 10:00 to 10:30, stick to it — even if they show up at 10:15. Politely but firmly say, “I want to respect both of our time, so we’ll need to wrap up at the scheduled end time.” It’s uncomfortable at first, but it sets a precedent.

5. Lead by Example

The way you treat your own time is the strongest signal you send to others. If you’re constantly late, disorganized, or overly accommodating, don’t be surprised when others follow suit.

Flip the script:

  • Show up on time — or early.
  • End meetings when you say you will.
  • Set realistic deadlines, and stick to them.

People take cues from leaders, whether you realize it or not. When you demonstrate that you value your time, you implicitly teach others to value it, too.

6. Design Systems That Save You Time

Finally, don’t just rely on willpower to protect your time — build systems that do it for you. Automate what you can. Use tools like email templates, scheduling software, and task management apps to minimize the back-and-forth.

For example:

  • Instead of endless email chains, use a scheduling tool like Calendly.
  • Batch similar tasks together to stay in a flow state.
  • Set specific times to check email, rather than constantly reacting.

These systems act as guardrails, keeping your time management on track even when life gets chaotic.

Closing Thoughts: The Ripple Effect of Respecting Your Time

Time is the ultimate non-renewable resource. How you spend it determines the trajectory of your career, your relationships, and your life. But here’s the kicker: it’s not just about you. When you respect your time, you inspire others to do the same — not just with you, but in their own lives.

So, stop treating your time like a spare tire and start treating it like a limited-edition Rolex. Value it. Protect it. And watch as others start to mirror your standard. Because the uncomfortable truth is also a liberating one: the respect you command begins with the respect you give — to yourself.

Hey there, if you like how I think, consider buying your copy of Talk Tech To Me. It’s the non-technical approach to tech recruiting that gives you competence and confidence as you take on the throws of technical recruiting the next generation of builders! Thank you!

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Brian Fink
Brian Fink

Written by Brian Fink

Executive Recruiter. ✈ #ATL ↔ #SF ✈ Building companies is my favorite. Opinions are my own. Responsibility is freedom. 🖖

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